DRAHOMÍRA WARGOVÁ: My never fading memory of visiting the Auschwitz concentration camp in Poland along with a recent trip to Berlin (August 2017), a book from Viktor E. Frankl (Man’s Search for Meaning) and many other films and literature which I absorbed as I was growing up, gave me the impulse to create the character of Drahomíra Wargová, a female photographer and concentration camp survivor. 

Through her self portraits, she attempts to comprehend the darkness of her past, including the loss of her fiancé, and the search for her own meaning in the present and future.
 

Name: Drahomíra Wargová
Nationality: Czechoslovakia
Date of Birth: 12.12.1923

Age: 23
Status: Single

“I am not afraid of Darkness. Once you have accepted her, there is nothing to be afraid of. You can walk side by side with her and pretend to be friends. You will give her the attention she needs, she will give you the inspiration. But I can not call it a healthy relationship.”
-drahomíra wargová






 

In the moment of despair
when your tears said goodbye to mine
I felt fire on my chest
while the coldness was eating my breath

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I heard that deadly sound in the snow
and I made the vow, do you know?

the vow to be your bride
with joy and pride

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Dream about morning dew

doesn’t let me sleep
how far can I go
how fast
how deep

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Ghost I see
never whispers

never walks
only looking at me

with understanding

 

Fresh flowers, I promise
you will always smell
to protect your soul from hell

 

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Everything is passing fast
disappearing
blurring
and I don’t recognize

your face in the crowd anymore

 

Being a human is such a fragile thing
ephemeral
vulnerable
and yet so beautiful
that it makes you feel miserable
when you’re falling apart 

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Entering my interior is not an avocation, it’s a necessity 

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Lying here lonely
makes me remember what I almost forgot
makes me feel the fear again
makes me stay alive
makes me


The gate was open when I arrived
the eyes were watching me
my skin was pulsing
hair dropped on the floor
purity faded in smelly rugs
it was the first time when to be barefoot
didn’t feel free

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I saw fear
I saw life breathing heavily
I saw musketeers giving up their swords
I saw the Lady in Black coming towards…

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I tried to find you
but suddenly we were all looking the same
there was no difference between woman and man
no difference between dead and alive
and we fought anyway
for all the memories we had in our hearts

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The situation takes only a few seconds:
the little human with golden hair

running towards me
hugging me 
my languid body awakens
skin is warm, veins are energized
I want to kiss him, protect him, do everything
but he runs away so fast
I couldn’t even touch his golden hair 

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How many words do you have left
any? none?
words - the strongest weapon
are becoming weaker than our bodies
weaker than our portion of meal
weaker than our blue feet
don’t let them go!
the words are here to say the truth
to save us
one day

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Every day I dream about heaven
reaching the heights
and disappearing in brightness
I see you smiling on the other end
happy and handsome
and I always descend back down
calm and fulfilled
with more rolls of film to process
with more images to print 
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Everything about you -
your clean uniform
smelly breath
heinous laugh
invoked in me
the very bottom of hell
broke every cell
in my fragile body
your presence made me forget
that I’m still alive

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Thousands of us
champions in life
were holding hands together
to fell the warm pulsing of each other
that was our meditation
our quiet mantra
our peace 

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I’m holding the tear between my fingers
fresh and clear like early mornings
I’m learning to take it all
diving into my pain gives me strength
to become the real me
gives me strength
simply to be

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I know there is so much passion left in me
a whole new world of colors and music
one day I will be born again into the same body
bold but kind
coming and disappearing
like a wave in the ocean
like an abstract motion
and
your eyes will question
your hands will answer
my restless moaning

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